I Am The Woman I Said I Would Never Be… And I Am Happy

Disclaimer: This is a ‘ find a lid that fits your pot’ type of post. I understand that we are all different and this might not be you. If not, let’s agree to disagree!

My birthday was a few days ago and it just so happened that around that same time one of my blogging groups had a discussion of what an African woman should be. I couldn’t help but go down memory lane taking stock of the woman I wanted to be then and where I am now.

Ten years ago, I was still in high school and had a whole world waiting to be concurred by me. I had all these plans and things I wanted to do. My idea of an African woman was strong and determined in every sense. And this was going to be me.

I wanted to be a career woman, career in what exactly I wasn’t really sure (this should have been where I sat myself down and really made sense of where I wanted to go) but I was very set on making this happen. I was going to conquer the corporate world. It was what I felt I was being groomed to be. This was where life was taking me and it would be the culmination of my life. I would have made it!

Fast forward a couple of years, while living and getting to know myself better I realised that this was not the person I wanted to be. I am a ‘content in the little things’ kind of person and I should have worked on that earlier on and saved myself a lot of stress.

I got a job as a shop assistant that I loved, I was happy there. I wanted to write and it gave me time to do that. People make me happy and this job allowed me to meet a lot of people and I realised that that was the direction I wanted to go. A lot of my project ideas and things I love to do are people-oriented, they are book centred and encourage writing. This right here is me.

There is nothing wrong with being that career woman, there is nothing wrong with being strong or independent but there is nothing wrong with being vulnerable or not wanting a career either. Do whatever sails your boat and makes you happy.

Had you told me ten years ago that I would be a stay-at-home mum who loves food (making it too), writes poetry, has a blog and freelances I wouldn’t have believed you. But here I am ten years later a mother of one, no corporate career, freelancing because I can never bring myself to leave my baby with anyone, passionate about writing, enjoys reading and most of all HAPPY!


17 thoughts on “I Am The Woman I Said I Would Never Be… And I Am Happy

  1. Oh, happiness and living a fulfilled life is all that matters.

    Belated happy birthday, Mami. I love you! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I relate to this post on a hundred and one levels.
    Thank you for sharing this and reminding me to keep loving me and what I have become so far!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Onyinye, I was very anxious about posting this. It’s been sitting in my drafts the whole week. I’m glad it’s making a difference.


  3. Hmm! I relate to this paa.
    We just need to be happy in whatever we are doing now but we can always strive to go higher. Let’s not forget that!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I agree with you, I too when I was younger believed i wanted to be that ‘Career Woman’ but I think as time goes by I am feeling like i’d be much happier with a job that allows me to be around my family and friends as often as I’d like, I have moved around A LOT in pusuit of my career but my favourite and happiest memories were always when I wasn’t at work LOL!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Wooow sissy Being African is a gift. We are rooted in our cultures and diversity is phenomenal.

    I think the secret lies within being content with who you have become and embracing your shortcomings. Contentment is key in our lives.

    I love how you structure words. Keep up the good work sis
    Much love from me


    1. Thank you Lebo, you made me smile. It’s true contentment is key and understanding that this life thing is a journey there is no destination. We need to be okay with that!

      Liked by 1 person

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