Letters To Matipa: Gather A Tribe

Wadiwa Mati

We underestimate the power of a support structure. A really solid support structure. If there’s anything I have learned in the years that I have been on this earth, is that we, as humans, need to belong. We are social beings whether we like it or not which is why some people get some type of way when they have no community around them and why it’s easy to go down a rabbit hole when you have no people supporting us. In all the years that I have lived I have learned that we all need support in one form or another, even when we say we don’t, we do need it.

Understanding this about ourselves makes it easier for us to find the people that we need to find. That being said, find people who are equally invested you as you are in them, people who believe in the things that you believe in, people who understand what you stand for and support you as you do it. Find people who have time for you not people who will take from you, people who will mold you and those you would do the same for.

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I think we take something as simple as a how are you? for granted. Let it not always be about you when you are around your people. Be conscious of how you are with them because that will also inform how they respond to you. Do you have time to ask what is going on in the life of others? Do you have time to ask, how they are, where they are because you want them to do the same for you. If you want them to make time for you, you have to make time for them as well.

Another important thing, actually the most important thing when finding your tribe is to pray about it. Don’t just let random people into your space. Everything about life is spiritual, including the people around you.

I’m not saying people might be the devil but energies, people’s spirits can disturb your spirit and to safeguard yourself, my darling. Pray about it. Talk to God. Let Him lead you where He needs to lead you and also let Him show you who you need to let go of which leads me to my next point.

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Some people are not forever. Some people are for seasons, and that’s okay. And as much as we want a strong support system, we need to understand that not everyone is going be there for our whole life journey. A lot of them are going to come and go and when they do you need to make peace and understand that they were only meant to be there for a season and when that happens, be able to get up and carry on.

Finding our tribe can happen when we’re young, sometimes it happens when we’re older, but ultimately it happens when it needs to. And that’s still okay too. There’s no rush. Finding the right people is not easy. It’s a journey and when you let it play out, it’ll pay off in the way it’s supposed to.

Vanokuda Mai Mati